It was such a bad night last night. I’ll tell you what happened and I’m still upset today.

I needed to go to the Board of Directors meeting where I live because they still do not have my parking space resolved back from December 2008 and I've been writing them and bugging them for now almost one year. Last week I had written them a letter by certified mail as to my parking space being unresolved and I went to the board meeting last night to try to come to a resolution.

I can’t go into a room with that many people on my own because of the past traumas and the resultant PTSD, so I needed help from my one cat and she came with me in the scooter basket. The cat behaved so perfectly and her and I were sitting quietly and calmly when I heard two witches loudly say “she has a cat, why would anyone bring a cat.”

Geez, it was like because I was disabled in an electric scooter, I was supposed to be deaf and shouldn’t have been able to hear them—that’s one of the mistakes people make about those with disabilities. Then a member of the Board came to me and asked me to leave the premises because the two women had allergies. I told him NO. (I knew the two witches were not on the board) but the witches started yelling “why would you even bring a cat.”

From the commotion these two witches were creating, you would have thought I had brought a box of rattlesnakes to the meeting and dropped them all over the floor. Truthfully, it was a disgusting show of humanity and I realize they may face problems in the future where they need a service animal or end up in a wheelchair and then may view things in a different way.

The Board asked me what was the problem that I needed a service animal (which is another rude and big problem people make with disabled people with service animals) and I told them I refuse to discuss that with them (like disabled people are going to discuss all their medical conditions in front of the crowd of people sitting there that lived in the development). The person from the board did ask if they could help me, which was kind, and I told them no.

The witches were at it again that they have allergies and can’t have a cat there and I just lost it and began yelling that she is a service animal, and the prior board, management, the management’s attorney and HUD allowed her as a service animal. The one Board member spoke up and said she was a Board member back then and the Board had only approved service animals for me for them to stay in my home.

Then I got very mad and lost it totally and began yelling that with service animals their use is not confined to a home, and particularly my service animals attend meetings with me, including meetings with agencies. And that it doesn’t matter if you are allergic to a service animal cat. You could be allergic to a service animal dog or a service animal monkey but that doesn’t get you the right to exclude that animal and me and ask me to leave.

So I was asked if I would go into a small little alcove nearly to sit out the meeting to help out, and I agreed to scooter to that area up at the front door and the witches then went and sat down. I loudly yelled that I also have cat hair and dander all over me, so you were near me before with all the cat fur and dander all over me, so if you were allergic to cats, you would have been allergic to me long ago and not just this moment.

The Board meeting started the meeting without any more nonsense about my cat. I just totally had lost it and had actually been yelling. I felt sick then and was so disgusted.

When I was in the little alcove on the side of the meeting room and the meeting was going on, I was still upset and I had some problems breathing and I went into a flashback of my mom beating me and I was reaching for my cat as I knew she was in front of me somewhere, and my hands found her and I was petting her and trying to breathe and trying to remember what the therapist told me about coming out of flashbacks. I kid you not that last night was a nasty night.

They also had still not resolved my parking space. So as to my parking space, I will make an appointment with the new manager (who used to work here years ago) as soon as I calm down and if he can’t resolve it, then I’ll take it to HUD.

I want God to give me eyes that shoot fire out and I want to destroy some really rotten people. That sounds so bad and I sound so rotten, but I’m so tired of it all. I stay to myself, I obey the rules and I keep a smile on my face until they pulled this sh!t last night. My cat was so good even though I was shouting. God blessed me with two wonderful cats. And as my wonderful cats remind me, I don't want to destroy those rotten witches--I just want to hold them down and smear boogers all over them!!!! (that was the cats' idea)







[This Message was Edited on 11/05/2009]

If this wasn't so sad it would be very funny...I have two cats and unless you come right up and pet them how can you be affected by them...the cat was in a cage for crying out loud...
People sometimes have nothing better to do....why couldn't they have just left you alone with your cat...on your lap...(sounds like a story title there) and go on with the meeting...
You were right saying that they could be bothered by you because you had cat fur on you etc...
Too bad people wouldn't just back off sometimes...
I remember reading another story like yours..it wasn't a cat but a ferret the person needed..
I can't remember how that ended but for some reason I believe it was termed a 'service animal'.
I am a great believer in what comes around goes around...so those witches will be burned in the near future somehow...somewhere..
Glen

Those two weird ladies....some people just love being mean, don they? I mean they could
have said; oh dear, theres a cat and we are allergic to cat hair and come over and spoken
nicely instead of talking as if you werent there...just rude rude rude.

As it is, if they saw you in a wheel chair some sort of niceness should have come up, I
mean its natural to try and be nice to someone who obviously is unable to function as
well as another healthy person, right? I dont know what kind of people are peopling the
world these days. Courtesy seems to have flown out the window.

Im so sorry you had this horrible experience. At least if they see you now they will know
not to try and bully you. They know no messing around with you. And i hope this will
make them modify their behavior with anyone else in their lives now.

You take care,

God Bless

It's unfortunate that there are such insensitive and downright rude people in this world, but there are. I hate hearing this happen to you, because you are such a kind, thoughful, caring person!
My advice to you is exactly what you would tell to others, which is to try and put this behind you. You KNOW those women are miserable inside. They are most likely treating others that way, (not just you) and in turn, will not be treated as nicely as they could be if they were kinder to others.

Bottom line, you need to get your parking space resolved. Isn't it a law that they have to provide for you?
I'm SO glad that your cat was there for you!! I'm also happy to hear that you didn't just take their crap and cower in a corner. Good for you!!! You stood up for yourself, which I would expect no less from you. =)

Go ahead and be ticked off for the day (I would be as well)...then get on with your normal routine. I'm sure those witches got the point. Sounds like you handled it beautifully!!

First, I was not pleased with myself at all for how I handled the meeting. I was displeased that in a situation, that my stress and anxiety went off the chart and I had a melt down and began yelling so loud they could hear me on the other planets. I always try to conduct myself at meetings in a calm manner presenting facts, so for me to really lose it like that is not something I am proud of.

I also regret deeply my yelling because my poor cat was there having to take it all. For the cat's sake alone, I should have "ramped it down" and not reached their level of being a witch. My cat deserves being treated with the upmost respect because she does so much to help me. I am grateful for both my cats.

The therapist told me that the Board of Directors should have, but totally failed in their duty to step in to get order from the two women right from the start--and asking a disabled person to leave because they have a service animal was really bad on their part. So actually the therapist felt it was very good that I really yelled so loud about everything, because all people, including the Board, will know in the future that I may be disabled, but you don't tread on me or my service animal and I won't give in without a fight. The therapist thinks it was good that I fully exploded and it got the point across that you want to fight with me and my service animal then you better pack a lunch because you'll be there a while and you'll face my wrath.

The next day I called and scheduled a meeting with the Manager (the earliest day available was over a week away), but I believe that should give the Manager time to review and resolve the parking issue. If we can't resolve the parking issue on the meeting date, then I will see if HUD can help me or if an attorney can take it Pro Bono (without cost).

[This Message was Edited on 10/24/2009]

What a stressful night for you. I assume you see a therapist? Maybe you can work on techniques to keep your cool when people are being rude to you. Or have a practice speech that you say politely but firmly. Maybe something like, "I know cats are not usually service animals, but my condition is not as common as blindness and I thank you for understanding." I know it's super hard, but then if the person says something else, just repeat your prepared speech politely till they get out of your face. (I've seen others do this, I loose my cool too. lol) Then be prepared with what you will say if they ask what your condition is. Either a short description or a polite statement about not wanting to discuss something personal with strangers.

Also, can you get a vest for kitty that is similar to the ones seeing eye dogs wear? Then maybe people will know he is a service animal, even if a not-common one. And does kitty just sit in your basket or is he in a carrier of some kind? Maybe if he is just sitting in the basket he could wear a short leash attached to the basket. I could see how someone who is afraid of cats (hard to imagine isn't it? lol) could be made nervous if it looks like kitty could jump out of the basket at any time.

Maybe since the board has seen you don't do well in a crowd, possibly a personal meeting could be set up for next time?

Good luck!

My service animal cat wears a cargo net harness vest that has a leash, but is clearly tethered to the scooter basket. The cat is trained to stay in the basket and remain quiet so the cat stays there. It is clear to all that the cat is harnessed and will remain in the basket.

The people involved at the meeting from hell knew I had a service animal cat--but did not want service animals at the board meetings. I even had special service animal ID to show they are registered service animals. The people who were complaining, would have complained if I had brought a service animal dog. They are rotten people and you can't change rotten people, and you have to work around them.

Thank you so much for suggesting that I repeat myself and keep repeating. Maybe for those who are thick headed, this is a good and wise approach. I do see a therapist and have never exploded like this at a meeting where I was asked questions about my service animal--and although questions were asked at support group meetings and agency meetings, the questions were always asked politely, and I was warmly accepted after I explained and wasn't yelled at and treated like dirt. I must work on not exploding.

Some people are so rude and mean. That we have known for so long. I can not believe that you have not had your parking space issue resolved. Not only do you need to speak to the new management NOW, you need to have HUD involved and someone that represents the ADA. Your frustration is genuine and honestly, I do not think that I would have been able to hold my cool for so long. Please call someone from ADA and have this issue resolved once and for all. This is not a joke. This is against the law and these people are making a circus out of you. God Bless You! You deserve more and hopefully you will receive it soon. Keep on truckin'! Perhaps into the side of one of their vehicles!!! OOPS! That was subliminal from the cat!! ;0)

I have spoken with the lady from the local Fair Housing Counsel and received the complaint form to complete and return to them. I drafted the body of it with the allegations of each incident of discrimination. The lady has the draft and will review it tomorrow. Drafting it and having to rehash everything that happened (even with a cat on the desk here) was so stressful and just pushed my anxiety and depression over the limit.

The people who were discriminating were middle aged as well as elderly, but the difference is that all of them are in excellent health, have no illness or disabilities, travel all over the world and all over the U.S., none have Fibro, lupus, cancer, dialysis, require crutches, a scooter, a wheelchair or have to have chemo and it has left them without compassion for those who do have ailments and disabilities. It's very sad that people can lose that compassion and treat those with ailments and disabilities so poorly.

I watched A Christmas Carol with my kids last night(early for that I know!) and I had forgotten how the angels taught Scrooge compassion in addition to teaching him that money was not the only measure of success. When he is faced with some awful human suffering and his thoughtless words come back to haunt him, it is just touching to see the change on his face. I know it isn't possible, and many have wished it before, but if only they could live a while with the struggles you face every day, they would have so much more compassion.

In a perfect world I know.....

I wish you strength and ummmm tolerance as you fight for what is rightfully yours.

People can be so mean sometimes. I am glad you stuck up for yourself.
I am allergic to cats also. I love them so much though!! If I touch them or sit on furniture where they have been is the only time when my allergies act up. Maybe some people are different from me,I don't know. I cannot see how being in the same room with them would have bothered them unless they were petting your precious cat. It's the dander that people have a allergy to,not the hair as I am told. It makes me angry to think of you having to sit in another area of the room because of these witches!!! Why didn't they move!!! I guess it makes no difference. I give you credit for not cussing at them,I may not have been able to keep that in. Maybe I need counseling too.?
I pray and hope you get the parking situation taken care of soon. Do not give up on the fight!!
Love and Hugs,Robin

It's so nice to hear from you--long time no hear!!!!

I'm the type of person that uses "anti-dander" wipes on the cats before going out with them. As a result of this particular situation, I bought an "anti-dander" spray that is supposed to be more powerful than the wipes (I spray the cats and wipe them down with it) and I will bring it with me from now on. The cat remains in my scooter basket and the only people that pet the cat are those that want to.

If one of those same people came in using a wheelchair and used a service animal to help them, I would never think to say an adverse word. I would tell them if I could help in any way, to please let me know. It pains me to think that where I live has so few disabled people and I am the only one with service animals because this nasty group and Board have been so successful in keeping disabled out.

I am SO GRATEFUL to my cat that she remained totally calm during the frey, especially since she is never around loud talking. Her calmness was so needed for me and I am embarassed and hoped that no one saw me having breathing trouble and going into a mental flashback in the little hall. That is NOT what I want to do.

Thanks for your prayers and wishes.