Reprinted with the kind permission of Ness and The Girl with the 5 Lads.
Illnesses such as ME/CFS, Fibromyalgia and Lyme Disease definitely put a strain on relationships so it is important to work at keeping the flame alive. Communication is essential between couples. Often we do not appreciate what a good talk to the one we love will achieve.
Just because you’re now ill, doesn’t mean date night should go out the window. I actually think it’s more important to keep it up, as chronic illness is so cruel and takes so much from us. It’s all too easy for chronic illness to get in the way of romance and to forget just how wonderful spending time together is.
Sometimes even the sun is too loud when you have an invisible illness so huge grand gestures involving wearing a bra, sexy suspenders, heels and getting dressed up might seem like hell for some people so bring the romance to the level of the illness. Gentle hugs, tender kisses and lots and LOTS and lots of talking and sharing each other’s emotions could be better than any medical prescription.
Here are 20 fun date night ideas for all you sweethearts.
1. Bring the spa to your home. You can either book a mobile therapist or do it yourself. Afterwards, snuggle up close in your dressing gowns, candle light, TV off and gentle music playing.
2. At home movie night, pull the couch up close to the TV, big snuggle blanket, popcorn and fizzy drinks. Kissing in the back row…
3. Get all the old photos out and together make a happiness book. It will be an amazing boost when feeling sad. We often keep past happiness locked away in boxes; celebrate all the happiness.
4. Classical music evening at home, candles and a glass of wine.
5. Go to a museum or gallery; you can hire a wheelchair if mobility is a problem.
6. Make something together even if it is Lego. The key is to turn the TV off and do it together.
7. Picnic in the living room. Lay a tablecloth out and make a picnic of all traditional picnic delights.
8. Theatre trip, plan well in advance and store your spoons!
9. Breakfast in bed together then snuggle all day watching DVD's.
10. Remember a beautiful meal you once had together and recreate that moment. Even if one of you is bed bound/couch bound. You may not be able to squeeze into the beautiful frock you wore that night but the same meal served on a tray with a pretty napkin, a little vase with a flower in and a card saying how much you love your partner will work wonders.
11. Cloud watch together. When was the last time you lay on a blanket in the park and just watched clouds? Take some drinks and enjoy each other’s company and the magic of clouds.
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12. Play a board game together.
13. Go to the beach, park the car and get a bag of chips (fries). Hot water bottle on your back; a warm blanket; even take a flask of tea. You and your loved one and the sound of the waves.
14. If the medication has made you lose your libido. Have an evening of sensual massage. Human touch by the one you love has amazing healing powers.
15. Watch the sun rising together with a glass of bubbly and pancakes and fresh fruit.
16. Find the best local ice cream shop and go for a drive.
17. Have a naked night chatting in bed.
18.Write a love letter to each other, put a stamp on it and post it.
19. Have Mocktail (if on medication) or cocktail night. Make them together.
20. Go for a coffee date, or bring it to you. Get a takeaway coffee and cake and enjoy it at home in bed together.
We all have different symptoms and our illness affects us in different ways. Some of us continue to work while some of us are bedbound. No matter what, you deserve something to look forward to each week. A day or night that is YOUR date.
Loneliness can be so difficult when you become ill. If you are single then date a friend or a family member. Next time they ask, "Are you ok?" Ask them will they help you make a special date on your calendar, something to look forward to.
There is nothing at all wrong in making a date with yourself. Something so simple as a date on the calendar to have a nice pamper evening alone, some nice food and a glass of wine. You are special so you deserve to be treated that way.
Always make time for yourself and loved ones, even silly simple gestures are worth it.
What will you do on your next date night?
Ness started blogging aiming to help others, raise awareness and learn from fellow chronic illness sufferers in the process. Her blog covers the ordinary life as a family, focusing on how life drastically changed when she became chronically ill. Her aim is to share positivity and help others find happiness. She believes everyone has the ability to shine, and likes to help people find the right direction.