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Love Means Never Having to Say … Anything

A relationship between a young man and woman with similar illnesses presents unusual challenges. For starters, he can’t speak.
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By Jamison Hill, New York Times, May 25, 2018

After dating Shannon for several months, I needed to say something to her, but I couldn’t. It’s not that I was nervous or unsure of the phrasing. It’s that I couldn’t speak. My lungs and larynx couldn’t create the air pressure and vibrations needed to say the words floating around my mind.

This is our reality. I can’t talk to Shannon about anything — not the weather or her day or how beautiful she is. Worst of all, I can’t tell her I love her.

You can read the rest of this moving essay HERE.


About the author: A graduate of Sonoma State University, Jamison Hill is a former bodybuilder, model, and fitness instructor. He has written for, among others, The Washington PostMen’s JournalThe Los Angeles TimesVoxQuartz, VICE and The New York Times. Jamison appeared in the documentary, Forgotten Plague, and his story is featured in an upcoming Netflix documentary about mysterious diseases. He writes about living with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Lyme disease at JamisonWrites.com. Jamison is currently finishing his memoir, When Force Meets Fate.

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One thought on “Love Means Never Having to Say … Anything”

  1. grannycfs says:

    What a wonderful story. I was so moved. There’s two people I can relate to as I have had ME for over 30 years and lived with so much unbelief. It would be wonderful to have a relationship with another person either with ME or someone who has an equally debilitating illness especially if its not recognized very well.

    I tried Match.com to find someone like myself just to see if I’d get any response but sadly was approached by someone who’s only interest was to scam me. It was so disheartening. At 78 I still have love to give to someone who understands how difficult life is with ME especially. I’ve given up online dating as a way to go.

    There are many people who need someone to love them in a different sense – just to ease the loneliness of living a chronic illness in the elderly years and pretty much alone. If you can relate to that or to people who accuse you of looking for sympathy or pity, you can be a friend to them and they to you to help get thru the days and especially the nights. Explaining this illness is almost useless unless you’ve lived it.

    I have made friends in the senior facility I live in. They may not have ME but they have other issues so a friendly gesture or smile goes a long way for both. There are so many of “us.”

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